Is Hazelnut soy gelato intrinsically evil? It doesn't set out to throw me into a high glycemic stupor. It doesn't intend on preventing me from being a size O if I so wish to be one. My taste buds would protest with chimes reiterating the good in it's nutty smoothness.
The majority of the people in the world aren't intrinsically bad in nature either. Last night way past the hour when most of us are deep in slumber and when I am usually diving straight into one of this batch of twenty first consult papers that need to be done this month, hashimotos thyroiditis could no longer hold my productive attention and I found myself on the phone with a close friend of mine who's also in medicine. He pathologically avoids hurting the girls he dates.
He and I have that kind of friendship which is solidly rooted but started out of an attraction that I wasn't into. He's a beautiful guy but, I would never sleep with him no matter how many glasses of wine I've had or how much my libido is in overdrive. I'll never be into him that way but our friendship has really blossomed. It's given the relationship a unique angle from which we've been able to traverse our lives in tel aviv with because I can give him the honest goods of feedback knowing that I've been on a different side of his affections.
From hello we were talking about Moon Sushi. Moon is my favourite sushi place in Israel. I go there all the time with my closest friends for super late night sushi and chats. Somehow we started talking about him meeting another friend of mine at moon the next night and her misperceiving it to be a date. All of a sudden we were well into a discussion of whether it's worth it to set out to always avoid hurting someone and what that really means. Can you live your life never hurting anyone? Can you exist never getting hurt and is getting hurt essential as a nudge towards who you're ultimately going to become? Do we need to get hurt to grow, not unlike a muscle needs to be torn apart so that it can heal back with greater tensile strength? and ultimately what does it take to turn the hurt into positive growth? is it resting and recovering or ceaselessly analyzing or being an egg against a wall? Do we need to face these questions to get through the illusion within our existence and work towards the contribution we're really going to be able to make with our lives which will then bring happiness for ourselves and a better humanity somewhat?
None of these questions are new or unconsidered but do the answers to them change?
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5 comments:
I've asked those same questions. I often don't like my answers.
I hate getting hurt. And it isn't just romantic relationships, it can be family, friends or just someone treating you badly when you don't merit it. But I don't know how you can live life without pain. Let's say you withdraw into a shell and try never to interact with humans. You may avoid a certain pain, but you are ultimately hurting yourself by denying yourself a chance at life. Sometimes we need to withdraw to protect ourselves. It becomes a pathology when the defense mechanism becomes everyday behavior.
So yes, we need hurt to grow. But that doesn't mean we have to seek it out. Pain, particularly emotional pain, has a curious way of finding us---damnit!
unless we give ourselves some sort of emotional epidural block... there must be techniques out there.
i think i can tolerate a lot more physical pain and discomfort than psychic pain... I think because physical pain is more quantifiable.
actually women in general do really well with tolerating physical pain better than men and yet we tend to more outwardly manifest our emotional pain than men.
I agree totally with that last statement. I think mother nature was smart when she gave us the ability to bear children--men can be such wusses on that score. But I don't know if it is the physical pain as much as it is the patience; pregnancy is a long uncomfortable time and birth is no picnic. The pain can be time consuming.
I also think we forget our physical pain easier than men, because men often use pain as a sign of strength and manhood. They repress their emotions so they often don't know they are in emotional pain.
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